A Suffolk entrepreneur has invented a jigsaw puzzle based on the pulling-out and replacing of his own teeth.

Gordon Pritt (63), a retired golden syrup tester for Lyle’s in Plaistow, London, thought up the idea while he was pulling out one of his own rotten teeth with a pair of plyers.

Pritt, who claims that the work he did at Lyle’s contributed to the poor condition of his teeth, started losing his adult teeth in 1978 when he first became a trainee syrup tester. “When I got the job, I couldn’t believe moi luck, because oi always lurved their Golden Syrup. I ‘ad it on my Shrove Tuesday pancakes ever since oi was a kid. Oi eats ‘em flat, not rolled – with a spoon. But arfter about a year of tastin’ the syrup, moi furst tooth started to jiggle-jaggle, and about a week later it popped out.”

Duty of dental care

Everyone knows that sugar is bad for the teeth, but golden syrup, which is pure sugar and very, sticky, sticks to teeth prolonging its corrosive effect on the tooth’s enamel. Gordon claims that no-one at Lyle’s ever made staff aware of the dangers of golden syrup, nor provided tooth-brushing training.

Today, however, after losing eleven teeth, Gordon’s poor dental hygiene is working to his advantage. He explained “When I pulled out the larst one, I was about to pop it in the jar oi keeps moi teeth in, when for some reason, oi decided to put it back in my gum. Oi troid it in arl the different ‘oles in moi gums, just for a bit of fun really. Then, oi looks at the jar of teeth, and oi takes out a pre-molar, and oi sticks that into another ‘ole. Boi now, oim startin’ to enjoy meself and so oi keeps goin’. Befar larng, oi’ve got me ‘ole mouth filled with teeth but in the wrong places! Larf!”

Dental mental

It was at this moment that Gordon’s genius idea popped into his mouth. I mean his head…

“Next, oi thought, wart if oi rearrange moi teeth in the roight order? Wouldn’t that be loike a jigsaw puzzle? Yes, it would, oi thart to moiself. So oi did et. Oi re-arranges ‘em, and then oi smoiles at meself an’ oi thinks ‘ow ‘ansome oi looks, an’ then they arl fell out.”

So what did you do?

“Oi troid again but this toim oi glued ‘em in with golden syrup, and it worked a treacle!”

And after that?

“Oi pulls ‘em out one boi one and licked arf the syrup, then oi puts ‘em back in their jar. Then, oi phones up jigsaws-R-us, a jigsaw manufacturer in Ipswich, an’ oi tells ‘em arl about moi teeth puzzle idea.”

And what did they say?

“They said they couldn’t understand wart oi was sayin’ and could oi put it in an email?”