DOVER, UK – Nigel Farage, former UKIP leader and winner of I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here, has proposed an unorthodox approach to stopping the boats with great white sharks. Yes, you read that correctly.
As scientists warn of the imminent arrival of great white sharks in UK waters. Farage has seized upon this potential aquatic invasion as a stroke of genius.
According to marine research group Ocearch, these majestic predators could soon grace the shores off the south coast of England and northern France. Lured by a veritable buffet of seals and, presumably, economic migrants.
Food for thought
Chris Fischer, founder of Ocearch, offered a tantalizing suggestion: “We believe they should be moving towards the UK. In about the same area as the small boats.” Farage, never one to shy away from controversy.
He has eagerly embraced this notion, positing that the presence of great whites could act as a natural deterrent to those attempting to cross the Channel in dinghies.
Drawing parallels to the success story of Cape Cod, where an influx of government-protected seals has led to a surge in shark sightings, Farage envisions a similar scenario playing out in the English Channel. “It’s simple,” he remarked, “sharks eat humans, and if economic migrants are crossing illegally in small boats, well, problem solved.”
Great White Shark a great tool
While experts caution against Farage’s proposal, citing concerns about the safety of both migrants and beachgoers, the notion has gained traction in certain circles. With climate change altering sea temperatures and providing ample opportunities for marine life to explore new territories. Farage sees great white sharks not as harbingers of danger, but as potential allies in the fight against illegal immigration.
Only time will tell if Farage’s vision of a Great White Shark-infested Channel becomes reality. Until then, the waters remain murky, both figuratively and literally, as the debate over immigration rages on.
Meanwhile: ‘Pot’ Nigel Farage calls ‘Kettle’ Harry ‘Black’
