There was more good news from the Tokyo Olympics today when Britain stormed to victory in the moaning.
Team GB was awarded a top score for completing a tough routine that was high on difficulty but a little low on originality. Rapid-fire topics included:
- Brexit
- Masks, vaccinations and COVID restrictions
- The weather
- Boris Johnson
- Keir Starmer
- Immigration
- GB News
- Right-wingers
- Left-wingers
- Work
- House prices
Despite a late drama when veteran Karen Smith was sent back to the team hotel for being too happy, Britain held their nerve and put in a superb moaning display.
They knocked the much-fancied USA team into second place, while Australia was disappointed with bronze. Judges determined the Aussies had been whining more than moaning, a slip that cost them valuable points.
Moaning captain Steve Walshe said: “This is the result of years of hard work and I want to thank everyone back in the UK for moaning constantly, especially on social media.
“You have all been our inspiration and we look forward to having a good moan about it together when we get home.”
British Moaning Association chairperson Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “It’s quite ridiculous that we have had to go all the way to Japan to win this.
“The Government has messed everything up.”
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