PIG FARM, SUFFOLK – The National Pig Farmers’ Union (NPFU) summer reception in Suffolk had all the makings of a typical policy-heavy affair—until its president, Tom Bradshaw, strolled in wearing a T-shirt emblazoned with the words “Stuck Farmer.”
The cryptic sartorial choice didn’t go unnoticed, with political observers quickly decoding its intended message: a not-so-subtle “F*** Starmer.” The Labour government, under Prime Minister Keir Starmer, is facing increasing pressure for its lack of commitment to the agriculture budget, and Bradshaw’s attire made it crystal clear that farmers were done with diplomatic pleas.
Bradshaw, usually known for his level-headed speeches, didn’t shy away from drama. “We’re facing a cliff edge,” he said, while gesturing towards his T-shirt. “And by cliff edge, I don’t mean the ones the Tories keep throwing themselves off of, I mean the financial ruin we face when the government inevitably leaves us high and dry.”
Loch ness pig
The NPFU is rattled by Labour’s refusal to confirm whether the current £2.4 billion agriculture budget will continue after 2024. Instead of direct payments for land area, Labour has dangled vague promises of environmental improvements—suggesting that future pig farms might double as bird sanctuaries.
Bradshaw isn’t alone in his fury. Farmers are jittery, not just because of environmental policies, but because of renewable energy projects that have hit a wall. “We’ve spent the last five years spinning our wheels,” Bradshaw continued, hinting that the farming sector’s 2040 net-zero emissions target is now as mythical as the Loch Ness Monster.
Meanwhile, Labour MPs fidgeted uncomfortably in the back, while Conservative MP Greg Smith smirked from the sidelines, ready to pounce. “Labour? Farming? Never heard of it!” Smith quipped, eager to play the hero for the nation’s beleaguered farmers.
Bradshaw’s “Stuck Farmer” shirt may just be the bold new campaign slogan for rural Britain.
Meanwhile: Waitrose puts Audi logo on posh customers’ free coffee
