A small smooth hound shark was spotted in the River Stour near Manningtree by locals.
Essex Wildlife Trust spokesman said that based on the videos, “it seems like this is a smooth-hound shark”.
These sharks have evolved with rigid teeth because they love feeding on crustaceans which have hard shells.
Do smooth-hound sharks bite humans?
Well, due to their small size and preference for O blood type, they might be considered harmless to humans. They can be seen in aquariums due to their extreme adaptability to living under human care and supervision.
What was this shark doing in this river and how did it even get there, some might wonder?
A “hound dog” and “hound shark” can be interpreted as a “promiscuous” individual.
Since it is a “hound shark”, much like a hound dog, reports say that it was looking for his next victim to “woo” and “seduce”.
Even though they are small in stature, they are the ultimate Alpha Males of the ocean.
They are also known as bully sharks.
An interview with Hammerhead Shark:
An anonymous Hammerhead shark came forth and gave a brief testimony to Suffolk Gazette
Hammerhead shark said that these hound sharks like to make fun of us by saying that we look like we are missing a chromosome. He said we look kinda down “syndromyish”.
Hammerhead sharks would probably make the worst patients when it comes to their eye doctor appointments due to their lack of equipment capable of measuring and assessing their weird cranial anatomy.
Hound sharks are known to be the ultimate “ladies man” of the water. Some sharks can reach speeds of up to 46 miles per hour which is like having a Lamborghini under the sea.
When they pull up in their “Phat Whip” they often show off their ultra smooth skin to the ladies who use designer skin products.
How do sharks get such smooth skin without any designer skin products ?
Well we have someone who might be able to answer some of the most puzzling questions regarding these strange creatures.
Lorraine Fisher, 34 is a shark expert and world renowned shark tooth fairy.
Many people do not know this but she was in Steven Spielberg’s film Jaws. She was inside the large, prosthetic, operating the shark. This is why the movie did so well.
Sink your teeth into that film buffs.
Sharks have the ability to regrow their teeth almost on command. It is said that sharks can replace thousands of teeth where us humans only have a fixed number of teeth.
This is the primary reason why Fisher retired from being a shark tooth fairy because she was working 89 hours a week to salvage the teeth.
Conclusion:
If you ever see one of these sharks along the local coastlines, and you see that it is visibly uncomfortable, don’t try to capture it or eat it, just call 101 and ask for the wildlife police.
In this instance, just admire it from a distance and consider yourself lucky that you encountered such a beautiful creature outside of its normal habitat.