IPSWICH, SUFFOLK – In a family feud befitting of an episode of Eastenders, Ipswich builder and gate specialist Bob Gates fell out with his brother Bill, after the latter legally changed his name to “Bill Windows.”

By Our Norfolk Reporter: Ian Bred

Bob, known in the area for his extensive gate offerings, from “Wooden Gates” to “Driveway Gates” (as proudly advertised on his Transit van), saw his brother’s rebranding as a flagrant betrayal to the Gates family name.

Windows 30

According to sources close to the brothers, Bill, a double-glazed window supplier and installer, made his decision – not to drum up extra business – but to avoid perpetual confusion with a certain tech tycoon of a similar moniker. “For the last 30 years, people would ask me if I was *the* Bill Gates,” Bill Windows said in an interview. “They’d laugh, then ask if I could fix their computers. I’m a window guy, not a software whiz.”

The rebranding, however, didn’t sit well with Bob, who claims the name change is “a blatant sellout” and casts a shadow on the family’s proud gate-fitting tradition. “We’ve been Gates for generations,” he fumed. “Now my brother’s ‘Windows’? What’s next—my nephew becoming ‘Dave Doors’? We’re practically a walking hardware store as it is!”

Bill Windows & Bob Gates

Since the change, local residents have reported a distinct tension between the siblings, with one neighbour suggesting the feud might affect future work prospects in Ipswich. “Bob Gates does good gates, and Bill Windows does good windows,” she mused, “but they’ll have to work around the fact they’re no longer seeing eye-to-eye.”

As of now, the brothers have yet to reconcile, though some speculate the feud might simmer down once Bob remembers he’s already cornered the market on gates, regardless of his brother’s name.

Meanwhile: Christmas decorations feud lands neighbours in court